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BRATS BROILING IN BLUBBER FAT
An Outline for oOffensive Sketch Comedy for Kids
May 1998
by K. Brian Neel, Paul Shipp, James Pargulski
1. Show opener - Audience warm-up - Get kids to say title of the show
three times, fast.
2. Reginald & Geoffrey - Two proper gentlemen sitting on a bench
reciting "My mother punched your mother in the nose. What color was
the blood?" The answer is obtuse colors like vermilion
or aqua marine or chartreuse or Robin's Egg Blue.
3. Who's your favorite uncle? Uncle Pauli! Paul comes out as Janitor,
Does Janitor smells monologue about visualizing stinky things.
4. Absurd Toilet Humor.
1) Little Jimmy comes out to drink water from
the toilet. Lid falls on his head and he
gets stuck. As he struggles to get out we
hear V.O. of mom: "Are you drinking from
the toilet again?" Jimmy composes himself
and answers: "No!"
5. Letter of the Week. The letter of the week always uses impossibly
long words. Sing the jingle theme song with letter of the week, but it gets
6. Boring story time. One person tells an extremely boring story
while the other two start doing activities in the back that are
distracting. Every time the story teller turns to look at them, the
two take an innocent pose as if they weren't doing anything.
7. Medical Minute with Medical Mike. Medical Mike does a bit on
safety or health. Goopy Guy is intro-ed in this segment as
someone who got a cut, but didn't clean it or use a bandaid. The cut
gets infected and this starts Goopy Guys long career as a dripping,
oozing, pus-prone character.
8. Vocabulaire scene.
9. Safety Sam. Similar to Medical Mike. Safety Sam talks about
petting dogs. "What you see . . . ," soft furry head. "What the dog
sees . . . ," Hot Dog hands or Halloween Hands.
10. The Adventure(s) of Dick, Jane and Pug. Pug is a stuffed dog that
gets pulled around on the stage. All adventures involve Pug having to
save Dick and/or Jane.
11. TV vs. Reality. We juxtapose an action hero getting hit with an actor getting hit.
12. Audience Time Out.
13. Compelling Question of the Week:Where do babies come from?
Announcer: From the Baby Store, where you can find all
of your baby needs.
We have big babies, little babies, fat
babies and skinny babies, and
babies of all colors.
The Baby Store is open 9 to 5 everyday and
is located in Seattle.
Background: A person has just bought a baby and the
checker asks, "Paper or
plastic" before he/she drops the baby in
the bag.
14. Absurd Toilet Humor.
2) Actor is sitting on toilet reading
newspaper and humming. Loud farting and/or
grunting sounds are heard. Suddenly a
clown or mime or a one man band comes on
stage and marches around actor on toilet,
then leaves the stage. Actor lowers paper
and looks quizzically out to the audience
and around the stage.
15. Tumbling Tumbo Brothers perform.
16 Gibberish song. Done in Kingston Trio style. "Don't Let the Rain Fall Down."
Copyright © K. Brian Neel. All rights reserved. Except for brief passages quoted in newspaper, magazine, radio or television reviews, no part of this book may be reproduced in any form or by any means, electronic or mechanical, including photocopying or recording, or by an information storage and retrieval system, without written permission from the author.Professional and amateurs are hereby warned that this material, being fully protected under the Copyright Laws of the United States of America and of all other countries of the Berne and Universal Copyright Conventions, is subject to a royalty. All rights including, but not limited to, professional, amateur, recording, motion picture, recitation, lecturing, public reading, radio and television broadcasting, and the rights of translation into foreign languages are expressly reserved. Particular emphasis is placed on the question of readings and all uses of this play by educational institutions, permission for which must be secured from the author ºs representatives. For all rights, including amateur and stock performances, contact K. Brian Neel. |